Religion: Forgiveness brings peace

My grandparents lived in the small town of Provo, Utah in the 1940s. Grandpa was the city’s fire chief and both he and grandma were well known and respected in the community. 

One evening while driving home from a firemen’s banquet, a drunk driver crossed over into oncoming traffic and hit my grandparents’ car head on. My grandpa died instantly. Church friends and neighbors, fellow firemen and the entire community helped care for my father and his siblings while my grandmother lay in the hospital with her injuries. 

As time passed, the help became less and less, grandma’s physical injuries mostly healed and she was able to walk again. She continued to raise her children; she took a job at a local school cafeteria and attended college to learn secretarial skills. 

She then worked for the local university and made very little money. She rented out a portion of her home to students to subsidize her income. 

It would have been easy for my grandmother to live in anger toward the driver who caused the accident and to blame God for this tragic and heartbreaking event in her life. Instead, she dug in, worked hard to keep her family together and kept her religious covenants, including the charge given by Jesus Christ to forgive all people: “For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you… But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” (Matthew 6: 14-15)

“Wherefore, I say unto you, that ye ought to forgive one another; for he that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses standeth condemned before the Lord; for there remaineth in him the greater sin… I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men.” (Doctrine and Covenants 64:9-10)

My grandmother remarried in her 60s and lived to age 76. She attended church weekly. She walked with a slight limp, which I’m sure was a daily reminder of that painful accident.  

It’s been said by those closest to her that she rarely spoke of the accident and never said a negative word toward the drunk driver who caused her so much pain, loneliness, poverty and heartache. Although she suffered much, she lived her life well.

Because of her faith in Christ and her willingness to forgive others, she would say her life was happy and whole. 

We too can find happiness and peace, among heartache and pain, when we find it in our hearts to forgive those who have hurt us. Forgiveness brings relief from the burden of resentment, which resentment fosters hate and desires for revenge, leading only to debilitating sadness and regret.

Jesus Christ is the perfect example of forgiving his offenders when, while in excruciating pain on the cross said, “Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.” (Luke 23:34) No matter how much pain others may inflict upon us, we can choose to forgive and find peace. 

Loren B. Dickson is the Morgan Hill Stake President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and a member of the Interfaith Clergy Alliance of South County.  He can be reached at Lo***********@***il.com.