Forum seeks to educate members of the ‘Sandwich Generation’
about resources available locally
Morgan Hill – As the Baby Boomer generation reaches middle age, boomers across the nation are finding themselves stuck in a unique social situation of caring for their elderly parents in the twilight of their lives and lending a hand to their children as they enter adulthood.
“It’s something that most of us have had no warning for, no preparation, no sense of what to do,” said Alex Kennett, who is working with the Morgan Hill Chamber of Commerce and a committee of like-minded “sandwichers” to get the word out about this phenomenon and resources available locally to help. “We’re only going to see more people in this situation as time goes on.”
Sandwich generationers must care for elderly relatives either financially or physically. Often the caregiver must deal with a relative with Alzheimer’s or senility, making the situation more painful for the caregiver and sometimes for the cared-for.
Kennett said when he and a group of other South County residents found themselves in the same situation of being pulled in two directions with no knowledge of where to turn for help, they came up with idea of hosting a forum to discuss the phenomenon.
“We want people to know that there are people around that can help you, that there are others in this situation,” said Maureen Hunt, one of the organizers of the event. “When we started out, we hadn’t a clue where to go. All of us want to help other people realize that there are other things out there; even if they don’t come to the forum on Tuesday, maybe they’ll remember that there was this forum, and that they can call the Chamber and get the information.”
Hunt, who with her husband, Robert, chairs the Fourth of July parade, recently found herself responsible for the care of an elderly aunt living four hours away.
“We’ve been taking care of her on a regular basis for the last two years,” Hunt said. “She had been living alone and doing well before then, but then she had a fall.”
Her aunt has “bones of steel,” Hunt said, having fallen before without serious injury. This last time, however, was different. She had a hairline fracture that went undiagnosed for some time. And after doctors discovered the injury, the Hunts had to scramble to find someone to care for their aunt.
“We were there for six weeks solid, 24 hours a day,” she said. “We didn’t know where to look, what to do.”
Once they finally found care for her aunt, Hunt said the next problem was weekends. She and her husband had to spend every weekend traveling four hours each way, taking care of the aunt around the clock while they were there.
“It was exhausting,” she said. “Looking for resources, I wondered how people who could not afford to get care managed. And how those with their own families to care for as well.”
Hunt and her husband are what some describe as “open-faced” sandwich generationers, because they have no children in the home. The Hunts are but one of many people in a similar situation that affects an estimated 25 percent of American families, according to Carol Abaya, a nationally syndicated columnist who writes on the issue and maintains the Web site www.sandwichgeneration.com.
More and more people are facing the challenge of raising their own children and taking care of aging relatives. Just the open-faced effect, Hunt said, even when the elderly relative doesn’t live in the same household, can be draining.
“The thing is, many times the caregiver doesn’t take care of themself,” she said. “We want people to first be able to find the resources they need, but also find ways to take care of themselves, to lessen stress, to feel like they still do have a life.”
