Can you believe it
’s 2004 already? I still remember the New Year for 2000, when
everyone thought that all the computers in the world were
simultaneously going to shut off, at which time the universe would
become dark and gray.
Can you believe it’s 2004 already? I still remember the New Year for 2000, when everyone thought that all the computers in the world were simultaneously going to shut off, at which time the universe would become dark and gray. Well, that didn’t happen and now it’s 2004. Did anyone else feel like this New Year just wasn’t that big of a deal? I think most everyone is already over the whole 2000 thing. We’re all waiting for 3000. Now that’s going to be a big year. I bet that’s the year when the computers will actually do the whole shutting off business.
I started off this year freezing to death, with picture-perfect snowflakes floating all around me. My best friend from high school, Leah, and I have decided to make a tradition of spending every New Year’s Eve in Lake Tahoe. There must have been five hundred people crammed on the street in front of Harrah’s, on the south shore, all counting down together for the New Year.
I think what I love about the New Year is that whole idea of a new, fresh start. It’s the time of year when some of us sit down and pick a few resolutions: things to change, to improve, or maybe to stop altogether. I know that usually by April I can’t even remember what my many outstanding resolutions were, but it’s the idea of actually contemplating them that I love. The empowering feeling of change. It always seems by the time Dec. 31 comes around, a fresh start sounds good to me.
After talking to friends and family about their resolutions, I decided I could offer them a little help in achieving all their goals. With my help, this year will be the most successful resolution year in history.
Now, some people take their resolution topics very seriously. My brother is an excellent example:
“For every action I take to be honorable and true to my word.”
Wow. I’m more of a “make my bed everyday” kind of resolution person. Advice for you Mike? I think your best bet is to take the safe route and avoid actions all together just in case they’re not as honorable as you’d hoped. But you do get bonus resolution points for trying that whole chivalry and honesty thing out. It might even score you some points with the ladies!
My friend Brandon has a good one that I think everyone tries for:
“To live every day to the absolute fullest and work hard to achieve my goals.”
I’m pretty sure that’s been my resolution for a few years now. This classifies as “typical dream resolution.” Although, if anyone can actually complete this resolution, it would be Brandon; he has enough ambition for all of us.
My surrogate little sis, Melissa, has chosen the classic student resolution for 2004:
“To stop procrastinating over school work and do better academically.”
Honestly, Meliss, it’s a great resolution, one we all wish to achieve, but it’s just not going to happen. You see, starting 14 page term papers the morning that they’re due is really the best time to get those intellectual juices flowing. Without procrastination, (it’s 2:31 a.m. and I’m still working on my column) most brilliant work would never be created. (Example: this column that I’m still working on at 2:32 a.m.) My advice? Just as long as you get it turned in on time, don’t worry if you were up all night trying to get it finished. We’re young; we have the rest of our lives to sleep.
Andrew Hyer has what I think must be the most outstanding resolution I’ve heard:
“To become what women want.”
Andrew, with a resolution like that you’re half way there. Step number one: the woman is always right. If she’s wrong, refer to step number one. Step number two: when making the mistake of ignoring step number one? Buying us flowers to make up for it is never a bad idea. Naming a few stars after us? Even better. Step number three: just be yourself; be honest, funny, and caring. That’s what women want.
My big sis, Camie, has the resolution every girl should have this year:
“To stay fit and have as much fun as I can. But most of all, to not cry over stupid boys.”
Everything a girl in this world needs to live by, and all rolled up in this one tiny little resolution! For staying fit? Big, you go to the gym all the time, what are you going to do, live there? As long as we all make it to the gym four times a week for at least 45 minutes, I think we’re all in the clear for avoiding that dreaded chubbiness. Either that, or look for guys who like larger women.
Now, for having fun, just make every moment fun. Okay, so that’s completely unrealistic but my Big Sis manages to keep smiling no matter what, so we all might as well try it. Never miss an opportunity to have a good time.
And, advice for crying over stupid boys? If they’re stupid why should we be crying over them, anyway? Before you let the tears fall, just remember all the things you have time for now that you didn’t before, the little annoying things you never really liked about him but tried to ignore, that with every wrong guy you’re one step closer to the right one, (Whoa, I must be pretty close, then!) and that one day, very soon, he’ll be a funny joke to laugh about with your friends. Ladies, when the fat lady sings, she sings for a reason: it just wasn’t meant to be. Strap on some dancing shoes and look into the wonderful world of celibacy.
My best friend Vanessa has a resolution that shouldn’t even be considered a resolution, because virtually everyone, with the exception of Calista Flockhart and Lara Flynn Boyle, has this goal:
“To lose weight.”
First step: dump your boyfriends. That’s well over a hundred pounds right there. Once that weight is off your back, you can feel free to hit up the gym with friends, cut back on carbohydrates, eat your five fruits and vegetables, and drink plenty of water. In no time you’ll be happy and excess weight-free.
Good luck to everyone with his or her resolutions in 2004. I’m sure it will be another great year.
Chrissy Bryant is freshman at San Jose State University. She writes A College View about local college life and things that catch her fancy. Contact Chrissy at ed******@*************es.com
