I’m telling you, this whole housewife thing isn’t easy. Oh, yes, I do get to watch Oprah every day. Or, I would, if I actually liked watching Oprah—look, is it just me or can she be a little, you know, preachy? I’m not sure I like to be preached at every day. But just in case she’s reading this, I am totally available for any episodes where she gives away cars. Actually, now that I think about it, is she even on TV anymore?
Oprah aside, there are many things that make me nuts about being a housewife. One, of course, is the name. Seriously, people. Can’t I get a better title? It’s not like I married my house. Although I do clean the toilets, so apparently we are quite intimate.
Another thing that frustrates the heck out of me is dinner. Oh, you’d think it would be easy, wouldn’t you? I mean, you toss a meat, a veggie and a salad on the table and voila! Everyone gathers round and eats and talks and comes together as a family.
Yeah, no. It’s not really like that.
First of all, in order to make dinner, you have to think of something to make. I tend to make the same thing over again. Yes, in my house we have Taco Tuesday. And Taco Wednesday. And Taco Thursday. On Friday, we go all out for Leftover Taco Friday.
Obviously, I am not good at making creative dinner menus. But I excel at making tacos.
Oh, sure I could turn to Pinterest for dinner inspiration. But there are a lot of issues with that. I am convinced that there are many, many liars on Pinterest. There are people who put pictures of these delicious, gorgeous, inventive dinners on there with captions like “Look what I made! Hand-rolled Asian chicken kebabs with basmati rice I harvested myself and served with roasted beans and yak butter from our recent Nepal trip!”
And even if you do find something that seems reasonable to make and does not involve using sustained fishing methods for the Catch of the Day, I can’t make it because I do not live in a house equipped with a professional kitchen. Also? I don’t know what a lot of the cooking methods are. I mean, seriously? Does anyone on earth who is not a chef or a former “Chopped” contestant understand what a sous vide is? Or know how to pronounce it? Or spell it for that matter?
So I guess I will bumble along with Taco Tuesday. Maybe I could add in a Macaroni Monday for some variety. And I could move leftover taco night to Thursday and spice things up with Fish Taco Friday.
Or I could just make a salad. Yeah, that’s probably the best thing. Maybe they have some good salads on Pinterest.
