If you are a Beatle’s fan, chances are you remember the song
“I Want to Hold Your Hand.” Apparently, to some long-time
married Morgan Hill couples, holding hands is an affectionate
gesture symbolic of their love shared year round, not just on
Valentine’s Day.
If you are a Beatle’s fan, chances are you remember the song “I Want to Hold Your Hand.”
Apparently, to some long-time married Morgan Hill couples, holding hands is an affectionate gesture symbolic of their love shared year round, not just on Valentine’s Day.
Although some of these couples plan to mark Feb. 14 with the usual romantic dinners, chocolates, flowers and gifts, they admit that nothing beats holding hands, hugs and humor to keep their love energy alive year after year.
As these couples exchange love messages this Valentine’s Day they agree that a good sense of humor and always being able to make each other laugh along with respect, honesty, commitment and sharing the same interests help keep the sparks flying while courting work, kids and the busywork that life brings.
“I love me and she loves her,” Ed Rife said jokingly.
Ed married Joanne 49 years ago after they met during an Easter holiday on Balboa Island in Southern California. Ed ended up carrying Joanne, who had been wandering around with a broken leg from a previous skiing trip. She still skis.
Ed said that he still hugs her a lot and that they often say I love you to each other.
“It takes a lot of effort and tolerance to make a marriage work and to keep the relationship fresh. You’ve got to laugh a lot and do things together,” Joanne said.
Joanne believes that for a relationship to work, a woman should seek a mate who respects her and that both should give each other the space to be whoever they want to be.
Joanne is looking forward to chocolates and red roses from Ed and Ed can expect something loud and heart-filled from Joanne.
“I like to go to the men’s store and find the colorful undergarments with the hearts all over them,” Joanne laughed.
Joanne and Ed have lived in Morgan Hill since 1978. Joanne is active with the Morgan Hill American Association of University Women and the South Valley Unitarian Fellowship. Ed is a member of the South County Chapter of Sons in Retirement.
The Rifes aren’t the only local couple with a longtime love.
“Dorothy is the best wife I ever had,” Bill Tykol said laughingly.
Bill and Dorothy have only been married to each other since they exchanged vows 62 years ago.
“On the day the everyone else celebrates independence, July 4, we got hitched,” Bill said.
Bill and Dorothy believe in looking beyond the present moment and not taking everything so seriously. They said that commitment and their faith in God is what keeps the love flowing in their marriage.
There can be something said for the adage, “don’t marry a baseball player if you don’t like baseball.”
“Marriages don’t last because people think that they will be able to change the other person,” Bill said.
Bill and Dorothy have lived in the South Valley since before they were married. Bill spent 25 years in the Morgan Hill Police Reserve; currently he works with the elementary schools as a “rock hound” sharing and explaining rocks, especially Morgan Hill’s Poppy Jasper.
This couple will be attending a Valentine’s Day banquet at the Morgan Hill Bible church on Monterey Road where they, along with other couples, will share how they met.
Respect and communication keep the love alive in Lou and Marvin Mirviss’ 25-year marriage. They like being aware of what’s going on in each other’s lives and take pride in communicating. Lou said that they make it a point to communicate daily.
“We talk things out and try to let each other know how we feel. We don’t like to hold grudges. We love each other, hold hands and laugh a lot,” Lou said.
This couple believes that if you love the person but do not like the person the marriage will never work
“Your mate has to be a friend as well as a lover,” Lou said.
Lou and Marvin like to make Valentine’s Day as fun as possible. In the past, they have taken trips to Napa Valley, Pismo Beach and some fun experiences they prefer to keep private.
Lou is known in the Morgan Hill community as Women of the Year 1997, member of the Rotary Club, Community Solutions and currently she is the YMCA team captain for fund raising.
Sharing chores, doing things together and being friends first are what Lolly and Clarence Caldwell believes make a good lasting marriage.
“It’s a good idea to get to know the good and the bad points of a potential mate and to become friends first, Lolly said.
The Caldwell’s 18-year happy marriage grew deeper over their passion for crafts. They spend numerous hours making antique miniature rooms dressed with accessories they create.
“We kiss and hug a lot and tell each other that we love each other,” Clarence said.
Lolly and Clarence plan to spend Valentine’s Day visiting their daughter.
“It’s going to be special because we just love each other, it is not the gifts, it’s just our love for each other,” Clarence said.
Patricia and Stuart Blumberg said that it is important to talk things out to let each other know what the other is feeling and that holding grudges and being stubborn can mean disaster for couples.
“Don’t hold grudges,” Patricia said.
This couple’s 44-year marriage is committed to being flexible, sharing similar interests, a good sense of humor and communicating.
“We do lots of things together. We hug and kiss, we travel and have really good times, Patricia said.
On Valentine’s Day, the Blumberg’s often go to dinner, a movie and there are the usual cards and flowers.
Stuart and Patricia moved to Morgan Hill six years ago. Stuart is a volunteer at Saint Louise Regional Hospital in Gilroy and participates in the monthly library book discussion group.
Most of the couples agreed that as Cupid touches the hearts of sweethearts, Valentine’s Day is no different from any other day when it comes to being committed, loving and thoughtful to your mate.
“It is good to practice kindness and senseless acts of beauty everyday,” the Rifes agreed.
