As I have every year, I attended Tuesday night
’s soccer game at Gilroy against Live Oak. Because I admire both
teams, I don’t really care who wins. Which side I sit on depends on
whom I know personally in the game or in the stands. (This year, it
was Gilroy’s). Because of the rivalry, and the high level of play
in both programs, I know I
will see a game played with intensity and skill impressive for
high school teams.
As I have every year, I attended Tuesday night’s soccer game at Gilroy against Live Oak. Because I admire both teams, I don’t really care who wins. Which side I sit on depends on whom I know personally in the game or in the stands. (This year, it was Gilroy’s). Because of the rivalry, and the high level of play in both programs, I know I will see a game played with intensity and skill impressive for high school teams.
I love sports. I will watch almost any competition (even, snore, golf), but I especially love soccer. There are a lot of things soccer (well, any sport) will teach you that you will apply to real life: how to use your skills with those of others to reach a common goal; how to effectively communicate with each other so you can get it done; how to adjust individual levels of performance when the skills of teammates aren’t equal; and, much harder, but just as important, learn to see what the lesser-skilled players on the team contribute to the those with greater skills by challenging them to exercise their own skills as a player, as a leader, as a teacher, as a friend.
However, to me, the most important lessons are the concept of fair play, and how to cope with adversity. It’s one thing to win, which is very fun, and involves the synergy that comes from what I described above – not a small thing to accomplish. But there is a lot to learn when things are not going your way – the ref blows calls repeatedly, the other team is playing harder, and sometimes dirtier – and you find your team is losing (or, you’re winning, but in danger of injury). How do you respond as an individual and as a team to the opposing team, each other, the ref, the coach, everyone involved in this brief mini-university that teaches how to maximize human potential and interact with other human beings?
Although I have seen more intense games between Live Oak and Gilroy (like the red card fest of two or three years ago), Tuesday I was probably the most disappointed in the lack of sportsmanship. As the article by sports writer Brett Edgerton, the Mustangs lost their composure (again, obviously not having learned from their two starting teammates’ sitting out because of red cards from a previous game – those, too, earned from lack of composure). Note to players: when a referee cautions you, don’t talk back. When your coach tells you to sit down, sit down. I know the urge to defend and explain yourself is strong, especially in an intense game. But, it’s not an invitation to debate or conversation, and even though you begin one, it is not one you will win. Really.
The Mustang players have good coaches, and the team has talented players who are fun to watch. The team went to the playoffs last year, and they could again. It’s the beginning of the season, and they’ve been presented with some important lessons. The rest of the season will tell if the young men are paying attention and are reflective enough to learn.
I hope the adults in the stands will learn some self-control as well. While I appreciate shouting out a profanity-free disagreement with a referee’s call, I can’t stand booing at any time. At the end of the game, people booed, and one woman shouted something less than complimentary about Live Oak.
Cross town – or in this case, neighboring towns – rivalries are interesting. Players opposing each other on local school teams are often teammates on a club team. So, why would anyone boo the efforts of the other team?
These are all of our kids. They might wind up going to college together, or working together later. And, here’s a news flash: it’s wasn’t the adults’ game, it was the kids’.
If an adult or youth doesn’t like how the game was played, officiated, or coached, and must have her opinion heard, then the time to raise the issue is not in front of everyone – children, the school’s students, neighbors, and other community members – but privately with the person or people who can do something about it the next time. The only thing to do after a game is cheer.
I guess that’s another lesson sports presents: how to lose graciously and, if you can’t do that, at least silently.
