Words are powerful. They have the ability to shape our lives and the lives of the people around us. A simple phrase can encourage us to be brave, remind us of our worth or even change the direction of our future.
Think about the times someone told you, “I’m proud of you,” or “You’re a leader.” Those words stick. That’s because what we say matters more than we often realize.
The Bible makes this clear in Ephesians 4:29: “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs.” That’s the Big Idea—our words should not tear people down but instead build them up.
We live in a world where sarcasm, criticism and anger often slip into our conversations. Sometimes we excuse it by saying, “I was mad,” or “Everyone else talks like this.” But following Jesus means choosing a higher standard.
Our mouths are like gates, and we are the gatekeepers. We decide what gets through. If we let hurtful words rush out, they can wound someone deeply. But if we choose kind, compassionate words, they can heal, encourage and inspire.
Ephesians 4:31 says, “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.” Those angry, destructive words only cause more pain.
Imagine tossing out an old, smelly shoe. You wouldn’t pull it back out of the trash and bring it into your house. In the same way, once we’ve thrown out harmful speech, we shouldn’t pick it back up.
Instead, Paul writes that we should “be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32). That means our words should reflect God’s grace. He has forgiven and encouraged us, so we should do the same for others.
Think about the people closest to you—your family, friends, classmates or teammates. What would happen if your words consistently built them up instead of tearing them down? Kids would feel more secure at home. Friendships would grow stronger. Teams would work better together.
Our cities would be more peaceful. Even small words like “Good job,” “I’m with you,” or “You matter,” can make a huge difference.
Here’s the truth: no one has ever been made stronger through criticism or sarcasm. Parents, this is especially important. Sarcasm doesn’t toughen up kids; it creates distance. Encouragement, however, creates connection.
How can you get to work to improve your words this week? Who in your life is hoping you’ll start using words that build instead of break?
Let’s take Ephesians 4:29 to heart: “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
Your words are never just words. They’re tools. Use them to build.
Justin Humphreys is the Executive Pastor of Community Christian with campuses in Morgan Hill and San Jose. He can be reached at ju****@*****************an.us.
